Officially a pharmer, but at what cost?

Hello, imaginary reader. It has been sometime since I’ve written and much has happened. Following a successful interview and entrance into pharmacy school, I proceeded to take a trip to Cabo in June to attend my cousin’s wedding; I went camping… twice; and I moved back to a familiar city, if not a familiar part of it. In taking stock of the things that have happened to me, not to mention for me, in the last few years, I realized how incredibly lucky, fortunate, and amazing my life is right now.

That being said, as the couple of you readers out there already know, I use this platform as a way to whine, bitch, and complain about said amazing life. Here we go…

Last week I experienced my first week of pharmacy school. By Thursday, my confidence that I could succeed in pharmacy school, broke. The unique program that I am enrolled in requires that I study materials given to me prior to class. At the beginning of a designated class, usually a week later, we are required to take a quiz on the materials immediately upon entering the classroom. A 70% is passing and needed to continue. I had two of these quizzes last week and did not do very well on them. I am beginning to doubt my ability to achieve more than just a passing grad, if I can even achieve that. I keep telling myself that it is VERY early in the semester to start worrying about this, but I can’t help but wonder how indicative these low scores are of the rest of the semester.

Do I have what it takes to survive grad school?

Am I psyching myself out too early? Probably.

I have redoubled my efforts, reassessed my study habits, and poured myself into the material for my next quiz. I really hope that it is enough. I keep thinking of all the disappointed people that I will have to face; I can’t bear it.

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