Archive for O Chem

Ahh…the sweet, sweet sting of relative failure.

Posted in Circadian Events with tags , , , on 21 September, 09 by MastrN8

This semester has definitely gotten off to a slow start. I just can’t seem to find the motivation to crack my books and focus on my studies. My mind wan to wander and explore a myriad of subjects rather than be  penned down to the rigid schedule of assigned readings that I need to complete. Although I currently love the subjects that I am enrolled in, save Philosophy which only achieves a moderately likes status, I find myself wanting to study other subjects.

Currently, I am in school trying to finish my pre-reqs for pharmacy school. For the past two years I have been enrolled in a community college to achieve this end. My ultimate goal of course is to get accepted at a Pharm school in state and become a pharmacist. Although I still desire to achieve this goal, I am finding that I wish to study many other things than just biology and chemistry. I have found that I have an interest in everything from history to the japanese language. I am impatient to get through pharmacy school, not because that is what I want to do for the rest of my life, but so I can focus my energies on studying mythology or the soviet occupation of Afghanistan or the theory of Pangea or the rings of Neptune…the list is endless. I am finding out that I would rather have an extensively broad knowledge base rather than a deep understanding of anything in particular. And yet, I know that in order to achieve my goal of being a doctor, I must focus and power through, blah, blah, blah.

The above two paragraphs reflect how I’ve been feeling for the past month or two. That all changed last Wednesday.

On Wednesday, 16 Sept 2009, I received the results of my first Organic Chemistry exam; it was a 76% C. Crap. I think the above two paragraphs will give you some insight into the reason why I scored so low. I know I really need to step it up if I ever wish to achieve the grades needed to get into Pharm school. I need to stop jacking around with topics that I have no business studying during the semester. There just isn’t enough time to take on subjects beyond those that I am enrolled in. To add insult to injury, I found out about an hour ago that the admissions test for Pharm school (PCAT) is scheduled for January. I must take the test at this time in order to apply for school next fall! After January’s test date, the soonest I would be able to take the test is in June, I’m pretty sure that it will be too late for fall registration. As I sit here typing this, as the words appear on my screen in black and white, the reality if the situation is really starting to hit home. I need to take this relative failure in O chem and use it to my advantage. I need to take the feelings of guilt and inadequacy and direct them into a positive direction. A direction that will light the proverbial fire under my ass so that I can finish what I’ve started…successfully.

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